Be still my beating heart

I was reading and came across an adoption turned special needs blog. The most recent post was about surgery for spasticity, so I just assumed the little boy had CP(Cerebral Palsy). I'm not sure if he technically does or not, I never saw the diagnosis listed, but I didn't look either. Neither matters really.

When I started reading, and saw spasticity at all, a little whisper in the back of my head said, I wonder if he had a stroke...

So I clicked on the link that lead to his story of how they found out(linked above) and among other things the doctors think this poor little guy had MULTIPLE strokes in the womb. When he was taken home he was developmentally delayed, but that was thought to be from living in an institution.

I sat in shock, and anger, and gratitude, and a sense of unworth at reading this. I am so very blessed by what has happened with Noah. The best medical care. Every specialist under the sun. Therapies, conventional and alternative on a regular basis. And on the other side of it all, a little over a year later, is a MIRACLE. Babies who have strokes in the womb RARELY survive to start out with, but my little man is "graduating out" of some of his therapies, he's developmentally on track!

But this is because he was born in the United States. (Yes, we have prayed, and I don't question that the Lord has worked in him as well)He has access to medical care, simply because of where he was born. The thought of how far he would have to catch up after living in an orphanage for a significant part of his first year is mind boggling. And while I am obviously grateful he is doing so well, at the same time I am upset for babies who are not so fortunate.



WHAT MAKES MY SON BETTER, WHY IS HE WHO WAS CHOSEN?



I don't know, I can't even begin to describe the sadness I have for these kids who are deemed "special needs" in other countries, but not even the sadness, the anger.



My kiddos they have it so good, special food, special soaps, more supplements than any one person should take. Access to doctors and medicine. And around the world there are little boys and girls with similar situations, but because they didn't get the care they have much bigger mountains to climb.



Our family will fight, all kids deserve medical care, and all kids deserve a family. (Little known fact about me, when I was in high school I wanted to be a doctor, and spend a portion of the year working overseas with orphans. This was before I was a follower of Jesus, funny how seeds are planted!)